6 months!

How is my little girl half a year old already?! I kind of had an epiphany yesterday. She won't be a baby forever. Obviously, I knew that but it really hit me yesterday. She won't need to be fed by me forever. She won't need to be rocked to sleep forever. She won't always think me saying peekaboo is the funniest thing in the world. Gah...I'm about to start crying. She's going to grow up. She IS growing up. I'm so excited to experience every stage of her life with her. I'm excited to go to the park and the zoo and let her run around. I'm excited for her first day of school (kind of...haha). I'm excited to buy school supplies with her every year. I'm excited to watch her become a big sister (many years in the future). I'm kind of excited to go through middle school and high school with her...haha. I'm excited for homecomings and proms and dress shopping. But I want to soak up every baby minute with my 6 month old. Her little gummy smile. Her sweet baby smell. Her crinkled nose when she squeals, smiles, and laughs. They way she yells at the top of her lungs and thinks it's hilarious. The way she is so happy to see us in the morning that her smile literally reaches her hands and toes...she just shakes with excitement. Ugh...I love this little girl so much!

The official 6 month photo. She loves those feet :)

This one way my favorite but she's covering up the 6 month sticker

Easily distracted. Our diplomas are hung on the wall above her and she wanted to just stare at them or out the window instead of looking at me.

She's growing and learning every day and I'm so thankful that I get to be here with her to watch all the changes going on.  It's a hard job (what job isn't?) but it's so rewarding! 

And tonight we're celebrating with cake! Because Mommy forgot to buy eggs when she bought cake mix so we didn't get to have cake on her actual half birthday. Such is life...

Mommy and daddy love you little girl! You bring so much joy to everyone around you :)

Weekend Wrap Up

Long time, no blog, huh? There hasn't been too much going on around here and yet we've been so busy at the same time. It feels like no matter how much we get knocked off our to-do list, there's 5 more things that need done. Crazy busy life.

On to the weekend.  Aunt Coco (Jake's sister Nicole) was in town so my weekend kind of started Thursday night.  We went to Jake's parents house to visit with them and had dinner.  Jake's sister, Hanna, was going on an official college visit so that was our one opportunity to see her this weekend, too.  I stayed at my parents' house with Addie that night since I knew we'd be in town again Friday and it gave me something to do other than sit around the house all day.

Addie was excited to see her grandparents and aunts :)

Thursday night my parents set up Addie to sleep in their room so I could get some sleep. It was great.  I got about 9 hours of sleep and it was wonderful. We hung out with my dad and sister all day and watched my baby videos and just caught up on life. It was really fun :)

Grandpa spoiling the baby

Friday night we went out for Mexican and margs with Jake's family and then just hung out with them for the night. 

Saturday we all slept in until like 9. It was fabulous. It had already been a long weekend and we all needed to catch up on some sleep.  We had a slow morning doing laundry and cleaning and watching Friday Night Lights on Netflix. Aunt Coco came over and we took advantage of the beautiful weather and went for a walk with Trip (our dog). It was so nice!

Addie was enjoying the fresh air :)

Aunt Coco got to put Addie down for a nap and then she had to head home and we had to get ready for the night.  Saturday evening we had a Mexican Night with some friends from college who all live in the same area now :) It's nice to have friends that are close by.  We ate tacos, drank margs, watched baseball, and Addie kept everyone entertained. It was another late night but we slept in until 9 on Sunday morning again.

Pretty girl was ready to go party

Sunday we went to the late service of church.  Addie was cranky and ready for nap time so we left as soon as the sermon was over.  I was planning on going to the mall and stocking up on fall candles and soaps but as soon as I got out of the car and smelled Max and Erma's, I texted Jake and said we should have made it a family outing with lunch. He told me Addie was awake so I could come back and pick them up so I did! We had a great lunch together :) We made a quick stop by Bath and Body Works and found out it was the last day of their 2 3-wick candles for $22 sale. Usually they're $20 a piece so it was a good deal. We got a pumpkin caramel latte candle and an Autumn Day candle. We also got soap for every bathroom and our kitchen. It was a great way to break in the fall season.  

We got home and Addie napped while we relaxed. She woke up and we tried baby food for the 349820th time. We were going to let her just feed herself but it was the one time she didn't want to stick her hands all over everything and in her mouth. So Jake put some on his finger and she ate it no problem. He did that a couple times before we switched back to a spoon. She wasn't crazy about the spoon but she ate the whole serving of sweet potatoes! I was literally almost in tears, I was so happy.

We played some fetch with Trip and then went for another family walk. I love when the weather is nice enough to load her up in the stroller and go for a walk. Once we got back, Addie did some rolling around on the floor with her daddy while I watched the Emmy's.

Overall, it was definitely a fun, busy, yet relaxing weekend. Successful in my book!

4 Months

Our little girl is a third of a way to a year old. She's changing and growing on a daily basis. Last weekend she spent the night with my parents and I swear the next day when she was home she was noticeably jabbering more.

Wearing a tutu Grandma Mary made....she just stared at me the whole time like "What are you doing....."

Adelyn,

We have your 4 months appointment in a little over a week. I can't wait to see how much you weigh and how long you are. I'm assuming your length will be average if not above average...you're such a long skinny baby.

Speaking of long and skinny, you weigh enough to be in size 2 diapers but you're so skinny that they don't fit on you. You pee out the back of them every time. So you're still in size 1s.

You love the new Oball rattle that I bought you. You also love another rattle that we have. You just grab it and shake it constantly.

You love standing and sitting up. The only time you're happy to lay down is if you're playing with a toy or talking to us.

You roll up on your side a LOT. Sometimes you even get completely on your belly but you can't get your one arm out from under you.

You don't mind tummy time but I can tell you just want to get up and go.  You haven't rolled from your tummy to your back yet. You just hold your head up and push your arms down and try to push up on your legs. You grab the blanket in front of you and try to pull yourself forward. You're so ready to be mobile....I don't know if I'm ready though.

You wake up in the middle of naps and in the middle of the night and just lay in your crib and coo to yourself and blow raspberries for 15-30 minutes and then fall back asleep. You're a loud little girl. It usually wakes me up at 4 in the morning but I like listening to you jabber.

We love you so much little girl!!

Confession Friday - Mom Style

I've been wanting to do one of these for awhile but I can hardly ever remember that it's a Friday, let alone have time to sit and blog.

I confess I was looking at pictures of Adelyn from when she first came home...how did my tiny little baby get so big already?!

Adelyn at 1 week

Adelyn at 16 weeks...what happened?!

I confess that the other day I got spit up on and a wet diaper leaked out on my shirt and I realized 2 hours later that I still hadn't gone and changed my clothes...pre-mommy me would have been disgusted with myself.

I confess that less than a year ago I didn't know what EBF meant. I also didn't know what sleep training was. I didn't know what milestones to look for in a 1 month, 2 month, or 4 month old baby. I didn't know that immunizations are more traumatizing for the parent than the baby. One little human sure makes a lot of changes in life.

I confess that I get way too easily frustrated when Adelyn is being difficult to go down for bed or wakes up only 30 minutes after going down for a nap. However, hearing those high pitched breathy noises on the monitor that let me know she's finally asleep or seeing her smile light up her whole body (literally when I go in to get her after a nap she smiles and her whole body jolts with excitement) make all the frustration melt away. It continually amazes me that this tiny baby can be so much work and frustrate me to no end but at the same time she manages to steal every ounce of love out my heart. So cheesy. So true. There's nothing like being a mother.

I confess that somehow Adelyn managed to pull just one hair completely out of my head today. And it really hurt. 

I confess that switching to formula has taken away a lot of stress and sleepless nights from our family....however, formula is messy and I'm not a fan. You win some, you lose some.

I confess that I'm so excited to watch Adelyn continue to discover the world around her. I'm excited to see her learn to roll over, crawl, walk, talk, start school, make friends, play sports, etc. Every stage just seems so exciting and fun!

3 Months

Adelyn is 3 months old! I know everyone says how quickly it goes but I honestly can't believe she's already 3 months. That's a quarter of the way to being a year old. Which just makes it sound like it's going by so fast!

We haven't taken a 3 month photo today so I'll probably post this tomorrow once I have the photo but I felt like I should at least try to write it on her actual 3 month birthday :)

One of many pictures we took last night

Where to even begin. Adelyn, you are the sweetest baby. So content and happy. Everyone says how beautiful you are and what a good baby you are.

You spent your first night away from home 2 nights ago. You slept at Grandpa and Grandma's house (my parents) and you slept 11 hours straight for them...stinker. Although last night you slept for 10 hours straight after we woke you up from a 4 hour nap at 8pm. We had family functions Wednesday through Saturday so I guess all the activity really wore you out!

You're starting to push your chest up during tummy time. You're usually content to just lay there and smile at me and suck on your hands.

Speaking of your hands...they're like your new favorite thing. You are constantly trying to find your thumb to suck on it. You usually end up sucking your whole fist or your arm. You're always grabbing things lately too. You grab onto your clothes and pull them. You're starting to be able to grab the toys on your activity gym. Those tiny, chubby baby hands are always busy!

You love your daddy. You usually just stare at whatever is on the tshirt I'm wearing when we're home during the day but once daddy is home you only have eyes for him and you're all smiles. Such a daddy's girl!

You love being naked. You're happy as long as we're taking your clothes off. You start fussing and crying when we try to dress you.

You're getting much more vocal. You coo a lot and you're starting to find different pitches and volume levels. You're also starting to make a variety of sounds. It's so much fun to just listen to you express yourself :)

Daddy and I love you so much baby girl. We love watching you grow and learn and we're so proud of you. We thank God for blessing us with you!

Weekend Wrap Up

I love long weekends but they always seem to be even busier than normal weekends!

Jake was in a wedding on Friday so our weekend started on Thursday around 3:30. I picked him up from work and we headed out to the rehearsal. It was an outdoor wedding at a winery and Adelyn and I tried watching the rehearsal but it was way too hot with way too many bugs so we hung out inside the winery instead. One place I never thought I would be with my 2 month old...a winery...haha. We dropped Adelyn off with my parents before the rehearsal dinner and then I spent the night with them while Jake went back home.

Friday morning was pretty chill but Adelyn decided to wake up at 5am and not nap at all. Jake picked us up in the afternoon and Addie and I hung out in the winery again while the wedding party took pictures. She napped on the way there and that was pretty much it for the rest of the night.  We watched the wedding from inside the winery...wish I could have been out there to actually see and hear it....but once again it was way too hot with way too many bugs for the baby.  Jake's family was also at the wedding so they had Addie for most of the reception.  She started getting extremely fussy by 9pm but since Jake was in the wedding party we had to stick around...thankfully there was some open floor space upstairs so we spread out a blanket and she was super content to just lay on the ground and stretch out.  It was the first time we've really seen a limit on how much holding time she can handle. We've learned our lesson for future outings...if she has to be out and around people that much, girlfriend needs some time to kick and stretch.

I suck and only got one picture the whole weekend...at least it's a good one!

Saturday I don't even remember what we did. Adelyn slept straight through from 10pm to 8am...guess that's what happens when you miss all your naps the day before. I seriously can't remember anything from Saturday. Oh, Jake's sister came over and hung out with Adelyn for the afternoon. Jake got a pizza for dinner and I got Taco Bell...pretty low key haha.

Sunday we both turned our alarms off when they went off at 7:15 and fell asleep until Addie woke up after 8...so church didn't happen.  I got some grocery shopping done and we did a few things around the house. Jake grilled some taco burgers on the George Foreman...they were really good! Emeals has definitely been worth it, so far! We've only been spending about 40 bucks a week on groceries, including staples like milk and lunch meat. It's been great!  I couldn't sleep last night so I ended up looking at nursery decorations on Pinterest and Etsy.  Etsy should not have an app. Or I shouldn't have downloaded Etsy's app on my phone. Wayyyy too easy to order things.

This cutie was only 18 bucks. It's going to look amazing on the yellow wall in Adelyn's nursery. So excited!

I also found a DIY baby mobile that doesn't look too terribly complicated...especially if I can get Grandma Mary's help and her crafting supplies :) We also want to try to make a canopy to go over her crib. Jake and his dad are also going to build a bookshelf in her closet and then we've got to get a shelf up and find some closet doors that we like. Then I think her room will be officially finished!

Super excited that this is a holiday week and the hubs will be off Thursday! Love holidays and family time :)

Clarification

I wrote yesterday's blog post in a hurry because Adelyn was waking up and I felt the need to rush through and write about my journey.  I think some of it came off differently than I intended so I want to kind of clear up where I was coming from.

That blog post was mostly intended for myself. I'm my own worst critic and judge which is why quitting pumping has been so incredibly hard for me. I hate even saying that I'm quitting. I don't like to quit anything. Before having Adelyn, I was SO determined to breast feed for the first year of her life. I knew breast feeding was hard and took work but I never imagined that we wouldn't be able to do it at all and I would spend quite a bit of time pumping instead. That option never crossed my mind.  So far, in our decision to formula feed, we've been surrounded by nothing but love and support and no one has said anything judgmental or negative towards us.  I have been judgmental of myself during this process and afraid that I'm weaning for selfish reasons and not really putting my daughter's needs before mine.  I also know that I had pre-conceived ideas about formula feeding and while I don't judge anyone who chooses that for their baby, I definitely would have formed ideas about them in my head without knowing their whole story.  That's just me being completely transparent and honest. This whole process has been SO humbling for me and I know that this is probably just the beginning. God is using my struggles to really show me areas of my life where I have been so sinful in my thoughts.

I want to get that point across.  I'm not claiming to be perfect. I'm not claiming that I never judge others or that I'll never jump to conclusions too quickly ever again.  Because I know I will.  I know I will be judged for decisions that I make as a parent and I will find myself judging others.  That's a habit I hope and pray to break over time.  I guess the point that I was trying to get across is that before you're a parent you make these plans and decisions; breast or bottle feeding, crib or co-sleeping, cloth or disposable diapers.  You usually have pretty strong opinions one way or another and have a definite route you plan to take. But those plans don't always work out. That was something I never really realized or considered until I became a parent. I always said I would breastfeed and now I'm not. I always said I would NEVER sleep with my baby in my bed and I confess we've napped together once or twice because that was the only way I could get her to sleep and get some rest myself. I plan on making my own baby food but I'm finally realizing for one reason or another, that may not happen. I planned on never letting my babies have pacifiers and Addie was getting a pacifier by the end of her first week.  It's ok to change your mind as life happens. It's ok to realize that the plans you had for yourself and your children weren't realistic or weren't a good fit for your family.  That's kind of the big revelation I've had so far as a mom. I'm not claiming to be an expert. I know I still have a lot of growing and learning to do.  I just felt the need to write this all down mostly as a reminder for myself when I get super focused on how I planned life to go but that's not how it turns out, but also in case there's anyone out there struggling with the same things.  It's ok to change your plans. It's ok to not have a plan. God knows exactly what I need to get me through on a daily basis and He will provide. When I focus on that truth, all the little decisions like breast milk vs formula or letting Addie self-soothe vs picking her up every time she cries seem to become a lot less important.  We'll make decisions. We'll make mistakes. We'll learn as we go. I'm not perfect and my baby won't be either.

And I'm done ranting...haha. I could ramble on and on to try and reassure myself. Instead, I think I'll go make the bed, try to straighten up, and just be happy in my imperfect life.

Parting with the Pump

So this may be an awkward topic to blog about...but I feel like someone has to. Not many people know this because, like I said, it's awkward to talk about.  Adelyn has been bottle fed from day one...not formula, but breast milk. Due to a lot of different reasons, some me, some her, I've been pumping since our second day in the hospital and she has been fed expressed breast milk in a bottle. We never got the hang of breast feeding, partially because her jaw and tongue were so recessed at birth and partially because my supply was so large and expressed way too quickly for her to keep up, among a few other reasons.

Why blog about this? I'm still trying to decide if I'm even going to post this, to be honest. Recently, Jake and I made the mutual decision that pumping is taking too large of a toll on me, on us, and on my relationship with Adelyn.  I guess I feel the need to justify the decision we've made publicly. But I also feel the need to open up about my struggles in case there's someone who reads this who is having the same issues or is struggling with the decision to formula feed instead of breast feed.  Or even to let someone who is exclusively pumping know that they aren't alone. Until I googled ways to wean from the pump, I thought I was pretty much the only woman in the world who exclusively pumped.  And I know not many people know that I was only pumping but everyone will know once Adelyn is on formula only and I know many people who will have an opinion about it, and whether good or bad, I at least wanted a way to get all my thoughts and feelings about it out.  People are going to judge. I know that. I'm becoming more and more ok with that every day.  I've got to do what's best for Adelyn and me and honestly, others opinions don't really factor into that.

The main reason I'm making the switch is because of how hard it was on me emotionally.  Almost every time I was pumping during the day would be the time when Adelyn would wake up from a nap screaming and wanting to eat and I literally could not help her.  I spent many pumping sessions in tears as I had to listen to my baby cry and I couldn't even get up to comfort her.  I was trying to do the best thing for her by giving her breast milk but since I couldn't just feed her naturally, it was putting a huge strain on our bonding and relationship.  And as I was writing this, Adelyn woke up crying from a nap and I was able to run upstairs and grab her and now she's quite content snuggling on my chest, which is just reinforcement that I made the right decision.  If I had been pumping when she woke up, she'd still be up in her crib crying and getting worked up.  Not worth it to me.  I know the benefits of breast milk and I very much wanted to breast feed her for the first year of her life. That's just not the cards we were dealt and I'm trying to be ok with that.  And I was fed formula from day one and I think I turned out pretty great :)

If I had been able to breast feed I think I would still be breast feeding now.  I'd be able to comfort Adelyn any time she needed comforting.  I'd also be able to breast feed her, no matter where we were.  Another reason I'm no longer pumping is because you can't just start pumping in public. Sounds silly, right? But we had a wedding about a month ago and Jake was in the wedding so we had the rehearsal and everything, too.  It was a busy weekend and I spent most of it stressing out about where I was going to be able to pump.  It was beyond awkward to have to ask the owner of the hall where the reception was if we could use his office so that I could pump on schedule.  It was uncomfortable.  Maybe that's selfish of me. But I didn't think about how much a pumping schedule would dictate my life when I made the decision to pump.  I hesitate to say it isn't worth the stress because Adelyn is worth it.  However, I know she will still thrive on formula.

I think a huge reason this has been so emotionally hard on me is how terrible society makes formula sound. I know breast milk is the best option.  However, formula isn't going to kill them.  I'm proud and happy that Adelyn made it 2 months on only breast milk and that she is still getting it for a few feedings every day and she's almost 3 months old now.  But even if she had never gotten a drop of breast milk, that's not what's important and I'm finally realizing that.  My relationship with her is what is important.  Being able to hold her and comfort her as soon as she starts crying and not 15 minutes after the fact is what's important.  Surrounding her with love and hugs and kisses is what's important. I know there's some people out there who will still judge me and disagree with me about how what's most important for my child.  I'm not writing this to change anyone's mind. I'm finally just becoming ok with the fact that people are going to think what they want to think even when they don't know the whole story or the facts. I'm not writing this to change anyone's mind.  Part of me is writing this to at least tell people my side of the story...but this is just scratching the surface on my journey with pumping.  If anything, I'm writing this to help myself work through pumping.  It has been an emotional journey and I've felt really guilty a lot of the time.

I guess part of me is also writing this to hopefully make people more aware of the fact that they don't know what anyone else in going through when they judge them.  That goes for many areas of life.  I'll be the first to say that before having a baby, I was really judgmental of people that formula fed.  I've realized now that when I see other people doing things or making decisions that I wouldn't....that I have no idea what their story is.  I have no idea what struggles they've been through.  I think the world would be a lot better place if people realized that instead of just assuming they know what that person has been through and judging them for the decisions they're making.

I'll get off my soapbox now and leave you with a cute picture of my baby instead :)

Helping Mommy with her blog :)

2 Month Check Up

Yesterday was Adelyn's 2 month doctor appointment. I knew she's grown SO much but it didn't really hit me until they weighed and measured her. She weighs 10 pounds and 13 ounces and is 22 1/4 inches long. She was in the 25th percentile for height and weight at birth and now she's in the 50th percentile. That explains why it took forever for her to grow out of newborn clothes but now she's almost outgrown most of her 0-3 month clothes already! She did such an amazing job. She smiled at the doctor throughout the entire examination. At every doctor's appointment we've gone to, she's never cried or fussed once when they look at her eyes, ears, nose, and throat. She was SUCH a good baby and I couldn't have been more proud of her.

Then came the shots :( She cried but only for about a minute (I say only but it felt like FOREVER) and then I was able to get her in her car seat and she slept the whole way home. She woke up and was her usual happy self until it was nap time and she could NOT get comfortable. She naps in her car seat right now because she won't sleep in her crib during the day and she just fussed and fussed which eventually turned into crying and screaming and she would only calm down if I was holding her and walking around. I tried giving her a warm bath but that just made her more angry. I looked in the medicine cabinet and we only had infant advil, not tylenol, and Jake wasn't going to be home for another hour and there was no way I could take her out to the store. So I found the most comfortable position I could for her....

She still whimpered now and then but her legs weren't touching anything in this position so she finally slept

Finally, Jake got home and all I can say is THANK GOD for infant tylenol. She finally was in a better mood and went to sleep around 8:30 last night and slept until 5 this morning. I doubt anyone really cares to hear about all of this but I want to remember as much as I can about her first months of life and that includes the pain and hard times. And as much as my heart was breaking for her, part of me felt good that I could comfort her enough to get her to sleep. I know I can't protect her perfectly and she will get hurt again...heck, we have another doctor's appointment in 2 months :/ But I know that I will do everything in my power to ease her pain when she is hurt. I know right now it's just pain from shots that she won't even remember but one day it will be bigger and more painful experiences and I hope and pray that she will still come to me to be comforted.

And that was not at all where I expected the blog post to go :) Just wanted to share how big my baby girl is getting and remember how horrible those shots are for poor little babies :(

Oh also it was Father's Day on Sunday :)

Can we please just focus on how cute these 2 are?

I mean seriously...melt my heart

And how identical they are?

Twins...it's so unfair.

2 months

Baby girl is 2 months old, as of Saturday! I can't believe how quickly she's growing!

She was getting sleepy so this was the best smile we could get. Still a cutie :)

Adelyn,

You are chunking up, girlfriend! I boxed up all your newborn clothes last week and you are quickly filling out the 0-3 month clothes. Some of the sleepers don't even fit because your legs are so long. Slow down baby!

We went for a little drive today while you were napping and checked out the schools you'll be going to :) It made me happy and kind of sad at the same time. I know it won't be long before I'm driving you to school on a daily basis and I'll wonder where the time went.

You still LOVE baths...hardly ever cry. You love just hanging out in your diaper, too. Not a fan of clothes. 

You don't nap well in your crib but you do great in your car seat...so guess where you nap multiple times a day? Momma has to get stuff done and it's impossible when you start crying every 10 minutes in your crib.

Speaking of crying, your cries are pitiful and break everyone's heart. Seriously. Yesterday, Trip jumped on the couch while I was feeding you and scared you and you were inconsolable for about a minute and it felt like an eternity. I was just about in tears. I'm not looking forward to your 2 month appointment next Monday and all the shots :(

You're sleeping like a champ at night...most nights. Last night was ideal. You fell asleep at 9pm within minutes of being put in your crib. You woke up to eat around 4am and were back asleep by 5 and then up again at 8. Most nights you're a booger to put down but you sleep for pretty long stretches.

You're smiling ALL the time. You love sitting up and talking to us. You're cooing more and more every day and sometimes you even seem to scare yourself with how loud you can be. You also laugh in your sleep sometimes which is the cutest thing ever.

You love your activity gym. You just lay there and swing your arms and kick your legs non-stop and talk to the toys and your reflection in the mirror. It's adorable. I feel a little rejected though because you don't want to look at me or talk to me when you're playing with it.

You follow Daddy and I with your eyes a lot and when people leave the room you follow them, too. When we talk to you, you usually turn your head. It's so exciting to finally be able to get and keep your attention :)

You're such a precious blessing in our lives baby. It's so rewarding and fun to watch you grow and learn every day.

We love you!

Baby Bloggin

I have no idea how people with kids find the time to blog. Seriously. I sat down to write this post over an hour ago but Adelyn had different ideas about how I should spend my afternoon.  I'm currently typing with one hand while I hold my overly tired sleeping baby who won't stay asleep in her crib but sleeps just fine in my arms. So I'm going to make this post a picture overload.  If you're on facebook you've probably seen all of these already.

 Snuggling with Momma

Mean? Maybe. But it's too hilarious to not share

First Mother's Day as a mom :)

She loves bath time

Her first wedding

Church time

So there you go.  In a nutshell, I think she's cute :) Also, we moved into our house...but that's another post that I'll get to in like a month.

Adelyn is 1 Month Old!

As of yesterday but who actually has time to blog with a baby. I was going to do a second part to her birth story about our hospital stay (pretty routine) and my recovery (not routine at all). Long story short, I've had a lot of problems with stitches and infections. Not fun.

Anyhow, I want to TRY to write letters to Miss Adelyn every month but who knows if that will happen. I'm already a day behind on the first month. Oh well...better late than never.

I may be biased but I think she's just adorable!

Dear Adelyn, you're a month old and already growing and changing so much! We went to the doctor today and you weighed 7 pounds and 12 ounces! Just 2 weeks ago you were at 6 pounds and 9 ounces.  You are a very strong willed girl.  You don't like to burp while eating and you let us know. You're so strong and squirmy. Those qualities all put together make feedings super fun.  Your hair is getting blonder by the day...and it's starting to stick up and get a mind of it's own already.  Sorry for the crazy hair genes :) You're a really calm and content baby unless you're hungry. You pretty much go from 0 to 60 in half a second when you're hungry.  The doctor was impressed today by how calm you were. He was checking out your ears and nose and mouth and you never once even fussed. He kept thinking he would upset you and you just sat there sucking on your pacifier.  Your dad and I love you a whole bunch and we're so excited to watch you grow!

Adelyn's Birth Story Part One

Now that she's over 3 weeks old I figure it's time to write this thing down before sleep deprivation erases all the details from my mind.  I just never want to put her down long enough to write this out...so we've compromised and this is what we're doing right now:

I was holding her in my lap and she started randomly screaming until I put her on my chest. Baby girl loves cuddling.

So I guess the story starts early on April 4th. I started having early labor contractions at some point in the early morning hours. April 4th would have been my grandpa's 100th birthday so we were really rooting for a baby that day but no such luck.  The contractions lessened in intensity during the day and got worse at night after I'd been asleep. This continued until Sunday night.  Around 10:30 or 11 I started having worse contractions but I tried sleeping until midnight and then I woke Jake up and we started timing them.  They were 7ish minutes apart...then 6.5...then 6...then randomly shot up to 10 minutes for awhile. And then down to 4 minutes. We kept this up until about 5am. They started hurting so unbelievably bad...they hurt all through my stomach, lower back, and were spreading down through my thighs.  I called my midwife and she said to go to the hospital and she would see me around 8:30 when she got there.

The whole 40 minute drive to the hospital my contractions were 3-4 minutes apart.  We got there around 6am and I was 5 cm dilated and the nurse said we weren't leaving without a baby.  This both relieved me and freaked me out.  Since I wasn't 39 weeks yet they couldn't give me anything to start labor or break my water so I had to go naturally.  I was afraid that I wouldn't be dilating and would have to live with those painful contractions until Friday when I would be 39 weeks. Thankfully, labor was progressing just fine.

They monitored the baby for awhile and then told me I could get up and walk around to help move things along so I put on a robe and walked about 5 feet down the hallway before I started having another contraction.  As Jake was asking me if I wanted to walk through it or stop and rest, my water broke. Everywhere.  A nurse walked out of the room next door and I just stared at her and then turned around and walked back in my room to get cleaned up....not the most glamorous experience to say the least.

The nurse came in and checked me and I was 7 cm dilated.  I think it was about 8 am by this time but I have no idea. There was no concept of time at this point.  Things got real, really quickly after this.  My midwife came in and suggested I move to a chair and sit backwards on it and rest my head on the back of it.  This helped ease a little bit of the contraction pain.  I went into labor knowing I wanted to have a natural delivery...and right around this point I regretted that decision :)  I started feeling this intense need to push but I was still only 7 cm dilated.  There was so much pressure with every contraction and it honestly felt like my body was pushing without me doing anything.  This really freaked me out and I lost sight of the end goal for awhile.  Thankfully, Jake was there to keep me focused and level headed (as much as you can be when you're giving birth). I was so tired at this point and just wanted to sleep, which obviously was not an option.

I sent Jake out to get the nurse probably 3 or 4 times because it felt like I had to push.  Apparently at one point I told him I wanted a C-section and made him go tell the nurse.  I don't remember that.  She came in and had Jake coach me to pant every time I felt the pressure to push because it would stop the urge.  It was hard and painful but eventually she checked me and said I was 10 cm and my midwife had just came back from the office.  I finally got to start pushing.  As weird as it sounds, it was painful but it was almost relieving to do what my body had been wanting to do for hours at this point.  I finally got to give in to the pressure and after 30ish minutes of pushing, our baby girl was finally born at 11:06am.  It was the most painful and rewarding experience of my life.  Jake got to pull her out and put her up on my chest.  We were both full of adrenaline and completely in love from the very beginning. I couldn't have done it without Jake there coaching me.

And that's about all I have the attention span to write at this moment. More about Adelyn's birth day and our hospital stay to come! I'll leave you with a few hospital pictures for now :)

Our family <3

Daddy is already wrapped around her finger.

Mommy may also be wrapped around her finger...just a little bit :)

Adelyn has arrived!

Our sweet baby girl was born at 11:06am on April 8th. Eventually I'm going to sit down and write out her birth story and I think Jake is going to write his side since I was in so much pain that I don't remember half of the delirious things I said to him during labor.  But for now I'll just say that she is perfectly adorable. I love her little sneezes, yawns, and cross-eyed looks she gives us.  She's more alert each and every day and I'm so excited to watch her grow. For now, I'll leave you with way too many photos :)

Our family <3

Our content baby girl

3 days old

First doctor's appointment

One week old!

They melt my heart

She really is a great baby. Hardly ever cries or fusses. She's already figuring out her days and nights and she only woke up twice last night to eat. Love her more each and every day!!

Contracts and Contractions

We got the call last night...as long as inspections go well we will be home owners on May 30th!  It's still not sinking in to me. Not just home owners of any old home but the home that we went and saw on Tuesday and absolutely fell in love with.  It's going to be ours...now to find some very cheap furniture that looks nice so we don't have a completely empty house...haha.

To follow up on that excitement, I woke up at 2:30 this morning with contractions that were actually keeping me from sleeping, which is something new.  They started right in the middle of my lower back and felt like someone was ripping my back in half.  Nothing even close to how painful I expect labor to be, but definitely NOT the contractions I've been having up to this point.  After an hour of those contractions coming 3ish minutes apart and getting more intense I called labor and delivery who just decided to bust my "we may be having a baby!" bubble.  She basically told me they won't stop labor but until I'm 39 weeks they can't do anything to help it along either so my water has to break on it's own and since I'm wanting to do a natural labor there was really no point in me going in just to be sent back home.  She said I could be in these early stages for 24 hours or more...so who knows when we'll have this baby.  I recently read that only 15% of women actually have their water break when they go into labor so now I'm like uhhh am I just going to be having these uncomfortable contractions for the next week before we can do anything about it!?

So I was up from 2:30 this morning until 7...the contractions eventually lightened up and quit hurting in my back. I went back to sleep until about 10:30....they were still not very strong but within the past half hour they've started hurting in my back again but they aren't quite as strong as they were last night. I know the longer I can keep her cooking, the better for her but I'm already over these contractions.  They either need to go away or turn into something. Plus today would have been my Grandpa's 100th birthday so it would definitely be a special day to give birth :)  Time will tell.  We could possibly get a house and a baby in the same week....and really why would we do it any other way :)

Ultrasounds and House Offers

So we had our ultrasound yesterday...I was 37 weeks and 4 days and Adelyn was measuring at about 36 weeks and 1 day...give or take 21 days! Yeah...I don't know why they even bother doing those ultrasounds....so she's measuring anywhere from 33-39 weeks. They estimate her weight at 6 pounds and 3 oz give or take a pound...which is a little better. I'm going in next week for another one...I guess probably partially because of the diabetes and partially so they can compare it to the one yesterday and see how they compare rather than using the estimated measurements.

After the appointment we went on some more house hunts.  The first house we looked at was SO cheap but for good reason. It was rough rough rough.  We're not scared of a project but there are some projects that are just too big...especially when we're going to have a newborn.

We had another house we wanted to look at but the owners called the agent and said they were packing to move this week and didn't want anyone looking at it until Monday? I understand the house is probably a mess but if you're moving you probably need to sell it like...now right? Oh well...we had one more house that Jake had just found yesterday morning.  It still didn't have pictures online, which means this visual person skips right over those listings.  Thankfully, my husband read the description and thought it sounded like a promising house.

It was the first day on the market so that's why there were no pictures online.  It was an AMAZING house...I think it's definitely worth more than the family is asking for but they apparently are very motivated to sell and need to move pretty quickly.  It's at the top of our price range but it is completely move in ready.  The yard is kind of small but we can work with it.  It's 4 bedrooms and 2.5 baths so we literally would probably never have to move unless we chose to.  It's in a great location with great schools.  It's close to a busy road so that's obviously a drawback.  It definitely has a few negatives but for how nice the house is we can deal with the negatives.

 So we put an offer in last night.  I felt like I was going to puke. It's such a huge commitment! However, we'll know by 6pm tonight if they accept our offer or not. Crazy to think that we could be home owners a month from now. Also crazy to think that the sellers may have sold their home the first day it was on the market! We've prayed about it a lot and we both feel at peace either way which lets me know we did the right thing.  If for some reason they don't accept our offer, we know it wasn't the right home for us and we keep looking. Now it's just playing the waiting game :)

*Edit* I almost didn't post this for fear of "jinxing" our offer...silly, I know. It may seem a little soon to be making it so official that we put an offer on a house...but I want to remember this time no matter how it turns out.  No matter where we end up, I've already seen God's hand guiding us through this journey and I want to be able to look back and see just where God led us on the journey to finding our home.

Prayers Appreciated

I'm 37 weeks today...no more procardia (medication to stop contractions) for me. I think I've been in early labor for a least a week...I've started dilating and thinning out and the contractions definitely aren't those painless Braxton Hicks anymore...they feel like my chest is closing up and make it hard to breathe at times.

My appointment yesterday went well but my midwife wants me to come back for an ultrasound on Tuesday. When I first started going there I was disappointed because they told me I would only have one ultrasound around 20 weeks unless medically necessary.  I've had 2 more since then, one because my stomach was measuring smaller than it should have and one because my first NST was non-reactive.  They checked the baby's size at the first one of these and she was measuring right one track with my due date.  At my appointment yesterday, my midwife measured my stomach and then asked me if we had done an ultrasound to check her size and make sure she's doing ok and I said not since the end of the second trimester.  She didn't say specifically why she wanted it done but she wants to check her size and my amniotic fluid.

I was happy at first so I didn't question it. A fourth ultrasound when I thought I'd only get one! Another chance to see my baby and how she's developing. And Jake's going to try and take a half day so he can spend the afternoon with me!  However, as I was leaving the office, the over thinking started.  As I was leaving I realized she didn't tell me what my stomach was measuring and she has every other time.  Does she think Adelyn is too big or too small? If she's too big will they induce me soon? If she's too small does that mean there's something wrong with her that's causing her to not grow? I haven't put on any weight since my appt at 33 weeks and it's now 4 weeks later....is Adelyn not gaining weight? And now I have to wait until Tuesday to find out.  I'm trying to just relax and trust that if she thought something life threatening was wrong that she would have sent me for an ultrasound right away.  Maybe she's just doing this to ease my mind because I brought up how some people say because my stomach is so small that I must be having a small baby and other people say they were really small, too and then had a 9-10 pound baby.  Maybe she's just being safe rather than sorry.

Either way, I would really appreciate prayers.  Prayers for Adelyn's health.  Prayers for a safe and healthy delivery.  Prayers for my over active mind to be at peace this weekend.  I'm just so ready to meet her and for unexpected things to not pop up anymore.  But I'm starting to realize that parenting is just a life full of the unexpected.  Things will never go according to my plans again (not that they ever did before...God has a way of having better plans for me). I won't feel this calm peaceful feeling that she's ok once she's finally here...I don't think I'll ever be able to not worry about her again. And that's where the prayers come in :)

Happy Easter weekend to everyone! I'll either be spending mine with family and house hunting or in the hospital having a baby :) Take time to remember all that Christ has done for YOU...and He would have done it for ONLY YOU! How can I even think to worry and not trust Him with my life and my daughter's life when He gave His life for me!

36 Weeks!

It's getting so close! And we have so much left to do....haha. Trying not to stress out!

So this picture is from last weekend....but I've yet to get out of my pajamas so this is what I've got. My stomach isn't really much bigger...promise.

Pregnancy Highlights

How far along: 36 weeks

Total Weight Gain/Loss: +20

Maternity Clothes: Yep. Or sweats.

Best Moment this Week: Finding out I can quit taking procardia next week when I'm 37 weeks and I can start doing normal things on my feet again and if it makes me go into labor then we're having a baby! I'm also 1 cm dilated and 50% effaced. So I'm hoping she's here before April 19th and I'm not one of those people that sits at 1 cm for weeks and has to end up being induced.

Gender: Baby girl :)

Movement: Lots. I went in for my weekly NST yesterday and I had to stay hooked up longer than usual because they couldn't get a resting heart rate for a base line because she was so active that her heart rate was constantly elevated. 

Food Cravings: French fries. Ice cream. All things I will be consuming more of once she's here...should help me lose the baby weight ;)

Food aversions: Spicy foods. Good news is bananas don't make me sick anymore!

Symptoms/Changes: Contractions aren't rhythmic anymore but when I get them I notice them for sure...not your usual Braxton Hicks. My back always hurts. I'm SUPER tired all the time. I also have been freaking out since yesterday's appt. I had a panic attack on the way home about how I have no idea what to do with a newborn and she could be here in a week. It's all sinking it finally.

Sleep: When I'm asleep, I'm sleeping hard. I roll around a lot though and when I'm awake I'm awake.  Last night I was up from 3:30 until about 5:30 and wasn't even tired but then I finally fell asleep and was in like the deepest sleep ever.

What I am looking forward to: Maternity photos tomorrow as long as the weather cooperates!

Husband's Hospital Survival Kit

So last week I was reading Valerie's blog Along the Way with V and J and she made her husband this super cute hospital survival kit with some of his favorite snacks and books and toiletries to get him through the hospital stay when she has their baby. And I thought what a GREAT idea! So I made one for Jake...nothing too special or fancy and it was super quick and easy to do!

I packed the following in Jake's hospital survival kit:

-Snacks: Oreos (his favorite cookie), orange slices (his favorite candy), and a cookies and cream Hershey's bar. I also grabbed a 6 pack of little orange sodas since he's not a caffeine drinker but orange soda is his favorite.

-Toiletries: Travel sized shampoo/body wash, toothpaste and toothbrush, shaving cream, and a razor.

-Fun stuff: I got him an iTunes gift card. He's not a huge reader so I didn't want to get him a book just for the sake of getting him something to entertain himself.  However, he is always using his iPhone and iPad so I thought he could buy himself some apps to keep himself busy or even a book if he's feeling crazy!

So there you have it :) Of course I had to give it to him right away even though I'm only 35 weeks...I said it was because I've been having the contractions and we never know when she may come but really it's because I'm a child and can't keep gifts a secret once I buy them. I want to give them and see the person's reaction :) Should work out well as a parent!

35 Weeks

So I didn't even realize I skipped last week...where did the past 2 weeks go? Time flies when you're having contractions that are 3 minutes apart....yeah....we spent last Wednesday in the hospital being monitored and getting shots to stop contractions. Fun fun. I swear I'm going to actually go into labor and sit at home because I'm calling Adelyn's bluff. I'm so ready to meet her though! One of these days....at my next doctor's appt I'm just going to ask them when I can start doing normal household chores again and if they bring on contractions we'll just go with it and have a baby instead of stopping it. Hopefully the answer will be soon!

I don't have a belly shot this week...I honestly don't feel like my belly is getting any bigger...which is weird because I figured by now I'd be growing by the day.  I feel like she's definitely lower though. And she's head down and ready to go whenever that time does come!

Pregnancy Highlights

How far along: 35 weeks

Total Weight Gain/Loss: +19 pounds total...somehow I lost a pound in 2 weeks. I don't understand. I did just have the stomach flu though so that may be the problem.

Maternity Clothes: Oh yes. Or sweats and Jake's shirts. I think I maybe have 1 or 2 tshirts of my own that still fit.

Best Moment this Week: Baby shower on Saturday :) Worst moment was having to cancel my church baby shower because of the flu :( I really wanted to celebrate with everyone!

Gender: GIRL! Little Adelyn :) Although every once in a while I'm like what will we do if we have a boy instead....momma can't handle that.

Movement: Yesss...to the point where it almost hurts sometimes because she stretches out so violently. I feel a lot of feet in my ribs and hands or elbows way down in my hips...not a comfortable feeling. She also has hiccups right now which I've just never gotten used to. I know I'll miss it all once she's here but it's all just a little uncomfortable for me right now. I'd rather be holding her :)

Food Cravings: Frozen custard from our local frozen custard place...meh. And McDonalds. I had a little diet cheat and had a cherry pie the other day. I haven't had one in years. So. Delish. I want one like every day now. 

Food aversions: Spicy foods. I got that BWW I was talking about getting on my last post...my stomach did NOT appreciate it...and I only got the medium sauce on my wings. I still love how they taste...my body does not love what they do to me. Sad day.

Symptoms/Changes: I get up at LEAST once a night to go to the bathroom. I can't fit into spaces that I think I can anymore...which is uncomfortable when I try anyway haha. My back and hips are pretty sore.

Sleep: Depends on the night. Last night I rolled around a lot but I slept so hard when I was sleeping. Other nights I wake up every time I roll over and don't go to sleep for 30 minutes to an hour each time. 

What I am looking forward to: Adelyn's arrival! Just a little over a month until her due date!