Confession Friday

I confess, once again, that I feel like I have nothing to blog about.  I also just typed worry about instead of blog about. If only that were true...there's plenty of things to worry about :/

I confess the only time I left the apartment this week was church, lunch after church, grocery shopping, and going to Wal-Mart last night to get Jake oreos...which turned out to be good because we ran into Eric and Hannah and went to get ice cream with them :) Yay for best friends :) But that doesn't change the fact that I'm a loser with NOTHING to do until school starts.

I confess that our guest bedroom is FINALLY (almost) completely unpacked...it only took almost 5 months.  I just got so frustrated the other day and it stressed me out too much to even go in there because boxes and crap were EVERYWHERE so my amazing husband went through most of the boxes and got rid of a ton of stuff. He's so great :) I sat there and tested a bag of writing utensils to see if they still worked...lol.  He did find one of my favorite stuffed animals that he made me at build-a-bear :) and my hair straightener, bronzer, bobby pins, and some eye shadow.  I was a very happy camper :)

I confess that any cooking skill I had before this summer went out the door when I stopped cooking for 3 months.  There were tears last night...which has not happened since the very first night I cooked dinner for us....over a year ago.  It was awful.  This morning I put dinner for tonight in the crockpot and it was another near meltdown.  It better be dang good is all I have to say or I may give up.  I need enough money to hire a chef......

I confess that Jake and I want 4-6 kids and that stresses me out just thinking about it.  I love children and as soon as we have them I plan on being a stay-at-home mom as long as it's financially doable but cooking for that many people, especially when our kids are teenagers, stresses me out.  Is it normal to stress out about stuff so very far in the future? Ughhhhhh.

I confess that I'm excited/nervous/worried about the fact that a year from now Jake and I could be potentially buying a house who knows where?!  Crazy, right?  For the first time in a long time, I have no idea where we'll be a year from now.  I don't know where I'll be working or if I'll even be able to find a job.  I don't know when we'll start having kids.  I don't know where we'll be moving or when we'll have enough money saved up for a house.  We're hoping Jake's new job goes well enough that we're able to pay off our debt (ughhhh) and save up enough in the next year for a nice down payment on a starter home :)

I confess that I kind of like school.  Am I a total weirdo?  I love getting new books and notebooks and pencils.  And then about a week into school I'm counting down the weeks until the semester is over :/

I confess I wish that I was a better homemaker.  I want a garden and to always have a clean home and delicious dinners with the right amount of fruits and veggies every day.  It's hard though! And I know it will only get harder when we have kids :/ Boo...I just want to be a June Cleaver...but most days it's too much for me to even drag myself into the shower let alone to be a perfectly kept up woman with a perfectly kept up house. Sigh...life's problems, right?